Part 149

I guessed I should've felt a little guilty about getting a buzz outa freaking Pop, but, hey, it was way cool fun! And I suspected that beneath all that muttering and grumbling, that he was actually enjoying it, too.

"You want me to clean my jizz off the table?"

"Nope. I'm gonna have it DNA tested. Maybe I can have you cloned. Hmmm, imagine that!" he chuckled. "A dozen naked Daniels running around the house."

"What would you do with them?"

"Do?"

"Yeah... do."

"Gawk," I suppose. "And complain constantly about the noise. You young whippersnappers are completely insensitive to noise. Take a school yard, for example. Absolute bedlam!"

"Would you rather have a dozen Pops running around?"

"God, no! That would be excruciatingly unbearable! One's far too many as it is."

"Do you have any friends? Like, y'know, guys your age?"

"They're all dead."

"Jeez, you crack me up, Pop," I giggled. "But seriously. Don't you ever get lonely?"

"There's a big difference between being alone and being lonely, my young friend. I prefer to be alone... if you can call having a head full of crazy characters being alone. When I write a story, I'm there with them. Perhaps not physically, but in my mind I'm totally involved in what's going on. I never get bored. And I never crave company."

"Does that include me?"

"There's always an exception to every rule, Daniel," he smiled.

"So why did you phone Muscle Teens to hire me? Why not some regular gardening dude?"

"What made you think of the concept in the first place?"

"We figured bare-chested teens would attract customers. And we were right."

"Seems I got more than just a bare chest."

"You complaining?"

"No... but my blood pressure is."

"Anyway, I still haven't told you why I came here tonight." While Pop sipped his beer, I went on to tell him about Jason, and how my bud had freaked at the idea of guys jacking each other. "But when I saw that killer boner staring me in the face, I just had to suck it. Woohoo! He went totally ballistic at first, but kinda mellowed when he realized how fucking awesome it was. I don't think he's too keen to return the fav, though. He offered to jack me, but I told him to chill, and to think about it."

"Are you on some kinda mission, Daniel? Out to change the world?"

"I dunno," I shrugged. "Does it seem that way to you?"

"I don't really know all that much about you, but you give me the impression that you're on some kinda crusade. Sounds to me like you're trying to prove a point."

"Like?"

"That sex is a game everybody can play, with whomever they choose. That it's not necessarily about having babies, or proving one's manhood."

"It's not that simple, Pop. Guys get all kinds of peer pressure... not to mention pressure from their folks."

"Pressure to conform? So how do you handle that?"

"Depends on who I'm with. If I'm with somebody cool, like now with you, I don't have a prob. But if I'm with my folks, or my bro Greg who's kinda jittery sometimes, or Jason, well I guess I can't be myself, at least not totally."

"But from what I gather, Greg and Jason have changed a great deal since they met you. You've influenced them much more than they've influenced you. Do you see what I mean about being on a crusade?"

"Jeez, Pop, if you saw those two guys, you'd see just how much they influence me, dammit! They're fucking hot! I'm talking boy-gods, man. Bods to fucking die for."

"So, if they were just ordinary guys with little or no sexual appeal, you wouldn't try to influence them?"

"I guess not."

"So what do you think that says about you?"

Whoa! Pop was into the third degree big time, so I took a swig of beer before answering his tricky question. "That I'm selfish?"

"Do you think you are?"

"What do you think?"

"I think that if I have another beer, I'll fall off my chair. You wanna make me a coffee? And one for yourself?"

"Sure." I rose from my chair, and switched on the jug. "Hey, is this just an excuse to gawk at me?"

"Yes," he chuckled. "But I also need a coffee. And you have the most exquisite buns. I don't know how the hell I manage to concentrate on... on... what was I saying?"

"Do you think I'm selfish?"

"Yes... but no more than anybody else. None of us has sex with another person because we feel sorry for them, or because we feel obliged to. And if that kinda thing happens, it's not right. Sex is an instinct brought about by a natural attraction to another person. If you're not attracted, then having sex with them would be a lie, a deception."

"But what if you just wanted to make that person feel good?"

"Then it would be charity, but charity disguised as something else. You would be feigning affection... a bit like hugging an aunt you've always loathed. Affection or love are emotions that should never be feigned... at least not in my book. That's the worst kind of lie."

I added the sugars, then milk, and stirred both cups which I placed on the table. "So it's OK for me to hang with guys I think are cool?"

Pop was just about to take a sip of coffee when he cracked up. "Imagine the reverse!" he laughed. "Yes, I think it's OK for you to hang with guys you think are cool." Then he raised his bushy eyebrows. "Do I belong in that category?"

"I'm here, aren't I? But what if I like some person more than they like me?"

"That's an all too common occurrence. It's called unrequited love... or perhaps unrequited lust. By the way, aren't you gonna sit down?"

"Nah, I feel like standing for a while."

"So that I can gawk?"

"Only if you wanna," I laughed, and caused my semi to bounce.

"You're making it almost impossible to... jeez! Where was I?"

"Unrequited stuff."

"Oh, yes. Well, that happens quite often, and it's a difficult situation to deal with... although the entertainment industry makes a fortune out of it... movies, music, books, TV, theater... whatever. Are you telling me that you like somebody more than they like you?"

"Well, Jason kinda freaked when he thought I might want him to blow me."

Pop studied my six inch semi for a moment. "Hmmm. Perhaps I can understand why. Anyway, this is where we can learn something from dogs. Do you have one?"

"Kyle."

"Well, then... uh, are you sure you don't wanna sit down?"

"Not yet," I grinned, and scratched my balls.

"You're an impossible scallywag, Daniel. Now then..." Pop paused to take a sip of coffee, but kept his eyes glued to my crotch. "Where was I?"

"Dogs."

"Oh, yes. Well, unrequited love is not something that dogs take into consideration. Their love is unconditional. They give, and give, and give. And if they get love in return, well and good. But it's not something they plan. They don't have an agenda, or a strategy."

"Mine does. He's got me totally figured."

"Ah, yes! But he's learned to know what pleases you, and what doesn't. So he modifies his behaviour to make you happy, 'cause he understands that when you're happy, you make him happy. But always his main concern is to please you."

"Not always. He can be a shit sometimes, but I guess nobody's perfect."

"So what do you think Kyle has taught you?"

"To be happy, I guess... and to make other people happy. But shouldn't I be able to expect something in return?"

"Depends on what your definition of 'something' is. Does Kyle expect champagne and caviar for dinner? Or is he happy with his doggy food? Y'see, Daniel, unrequited love... or lust... means that one person in the relationship has expectations that are unrealistic under the circumstances. To give you an example, you love to tease me, and watch my eyebrows take the elevator to the ceiling. But what if I wanted more?"

"More what?"

"I think you know what I mean."

"You mean like hit on me? But you wouldn't. I know you wouldn't."

"So what would you say my expectations were?"

"OK! I get it now! You're so cool, Pop. Hey! Wait a second! Does that mean you're unrequited or whatever?"

"No... well, not exactly. I look at all the things you have to offer, not just the obvious, which at the moment is about as obvious as it could be. Jeez!" He took another sip of coffee, then continued. "I'm not the kinda guy who normally seeks the company of others, but I quite enjoy yours. I'm like your dog Kyle... I know what pleases you, and what might disturb you."

"So I'm turning you on, right? I mean like standing here naked?"

"You mean it shows?" he cracked. "Anyway, what would be the point if you weren't? There'd be no game to play. But I understand the rules, even though they're unspoken. And so do you."

"Jeez, I'm not sure if I really understand all this shit... but I think I do... kinda. How come you know all this stuff?"

"I've been around."

"Are you always right?"

"Wrong less often."

"What did you mean about all the things I have to offer?"

"Are you sure you don't wanna sit down?"

"Not yet." I grinned.

"Well, that's one of the things you have to offer. You're an irrepressible scallywag... albeit a lovable one. But it's all part of your personality... and it's your personality that eclipses everything else about you. I would venture to say that your body is not unique. Lots of teens would be as physically gifted as you are..."

"Like Jason... or Greg."

"But what separates you from most other people is... well, for starters, that damn impish grin of yours. It could sell encyclopaedias to blind illiterates. There's something about you... an innate ability to radiate joy and warmth. You're uplifting. It's as though you are a ray of sunshine on a gray day."

"Kyle says it shines outa my ass. Wanna see?" I about faced, then spread my ass cheeks. "Can you see it?" Pop didn't answer, but he was a bit pale looking when I turned to face him again. "Is Kyle right?"

"Metaphorically. Jeez! I need something stronger than coffee!"

"No you don't. Hey, I'd better split. You wanna put my blades on? I'll sit on the bench."

It was the dope to watch Pop take his time fitting my blades to my feet, as if my feet were something very special to him. Maybe everything about me was special to him... at least, that's how he made me feel.

"Why do you like me?" he asked as he tied the laces.

"I dunno. You're cool to be with. I feel kinda free here... and kinda important."

"That's ridiculous. You're important at home... and to your friends."

"Yeah, but this is different. It's like I could tell you anything and you'd be cool about it. Anyway, I learn stuff from you."

"Ditto."

"You gonna gimme a hug before I go?" I asked as I slid my bare ass off the bench.

"Put your shorts on first."

"No, gimme one now."

Pop put his arms around me, and bent forward so that body contact was minimal. A second later, he let me go.

"That wasn't a fucking hug!" I complained. "That was like you were hugging an aunt you hated. Gimme a proper one."

"I don't know how."

"Jeez, do I have to teach you everything?" I wrapped my arms around the old dude and held him tight in a bear hug. When I released my grip after some moments, there were tears in his green eyes. "Hugs are supposed to make you happy, not sad."

"Put your shorts on and get the hell outa here."

"K, Pop," I smiled. "Thanks a stack for chillin' with me."

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 Daniel's Diary Part 150