Tampa, Florida
Part 3
I was getting a bit desperate as the afternoon wore on. I’d lost track of the number of times I was tempted to ride my bike down to the marina. But I’d keep telling myself that Mark would be busy with the yacht’s new owner or whatever. They were probably sailing somewhere, showing the guy the ropes. Meantime, Paul was getting more and more pissed at me ‘cause I wasn’t being my usual self.
“Sorry, bud,” I said as I heaved myself outa the pool. “Honest, I am. It’s just that this is a big fucking deal, man. Mark’s in town. It’s like a part of Cody’s in town. Cody loved that dude, big time.”
“I thought you’d gotten over Cody.” Paul was still in the water, directly below where I was standing. He’d known me a long time, but he never tired of checking out my bod when I was naked. It crossed my mind that I should piss on him, which made me crack. “What are you laughing at?”
“Nothing, man. Hey, you’re a good friend, y’know. My best bud. And you’ve helped me a lot with the Cody thing. But just ‘cause he’s gone doesn’t mean…” And then it happened without warning. I couldn’t help it. My eyes suddenly began to water and sting like hell at the thought of the words I was about to speak, so I dove in to the pool.
“Doesn’t mean what?” Paul demanded after I’d surfaced, and flicked the water from my hair. At least the dive had given me an opportunity to compose myself, and an excuse to rub my eyes.
“Forget it.”
“I don’t understand you. Cody’s been gone for ages.”
“If I died, how long would it take you to get over it?”
“That’s different, Daniel. You and I practically live in each other’s pockets. Anyway, don’t talk like that. It’s not gonna happen. You’re gonna live forever.”
“Yeah, right.” I climbed outa the pool again, and readied myself for another dive. “I don’t think you understand just how close Cody and I were. No disrespect, dude. It’s not like you’re not important to me. You know that already. But Code was the kinda guy you could get to know in less than a hour, and also the kinda guy you could never forget, no matter how long you were physically separated from him. He had that … something … about him. Some kinda charisma or magic or whatever. There’s no way I’ll ever forget him.”
Paul waited until I’d surfaced again before he spoke. “Forgetting him is not what I’m talking about, Daniel. I’m talking about you and me. Sometimes when we’re together, and we’re doing rad stuff, I wonder if you’re thinking about him.”
It was true. Sometimes Paul and I would be having sex – totally awesome sex just like always – and my mind would drift. I’d start remembering the times Code and I were together. But that was something I couldn’t discuss with Paul. It would hurt his feelings, and I couldn’t do that. I really didn’t know what to say, so I dove under the surface and swam underwater to the other side of the pool. Paul was there to meet me.
“Well?”
“No third degree, OK? I’m not in the fucking mood.”
“So it’s true, then. You do think about him when we’re together.”
“OK… maybe sometimes.”
“I’m going home.” And with that, Paul swam to the ladder, then headed for his towel. He had his back to me, probably trying to hide the tears.
“Dammit, Paul!” I said as I approached him from behind, then spun him around so that he was facing me. His eyes were red, and it wasn’t just from the swimming. “What’s the matter with you?”
“You’re still in love with a fucking corpse, that’s what’s the matter with me.”
I openhanded the dude so hard across the face, he was flat on his back on the lawn in a second. But not for long. He scrambled to his feet and laid into me, with fists flying everywhere. We were rolling around on the grass, punching the shit outa each other when Andy arrived, and forced us apart. “What’s going on here?”
Neither Paul nor I answered, so Andy repeated the question, only more firmly.
“Nothing,” I said meekly.
“Nothing? You call this nothing? You were trying to kill each other.”
Paul managed to extricate himself from Andy’s grip, grabbed his clothes off the lawn, dressed, and was gone in a minute. By then, mom was reading the fucking riot act, and demanding to know what was going on.
“Hey, mom, it’s guy stuff,” I shrugged, nursing a saw jaw. “We were fooling around and it kinda got outa hand. That’s all. It’ll be cool again tomorrow.”
“I’ll never understand boys! Paul is your best friend for God’s sake! Anyway, Daniel, you’re grounded for the rest of the weekend.”
Yeah, I was in deep shit. Deep shit with Andy, deep shit with my mom, and even deeper shit with Paul. I showered and cleaned up, then went to the only refuge available to me – my room. I sat on the side of my bed, held my face in my hands, and bawled my fucking eyes out. “Why the fuck did Paul have to ask that question in the first place?” I kept asking myself. I should never had said anything. Or I should have lied. Now I’d gotten myself into a situation that I was never gonna get myself out of. And the more I thought about it, the more convinced I became that it was all over between Paul and me. There was no way that dude was ever gonna speak to me again. No way.
About an hour later, I was sitting at the comp, reading some of Code’s old emails, when there was a knock at my door.
“Hey, man,” Greg smiled as he entered the room. “Howzit?”
“Guess you heard.”
“Yeah, my dad told me you and Paul had a fight. So whatya doin?” He stood behind me and rubbed my shoulders while he checked the comp screen.
“I fucked up. I figure even Cody’s mad at me.”
“Hey, bro. Don’t let it get you down. You guys have had fights before and made up.”
“Yeah, right. Paul thinks I’m an asshole.”
I felt my bro’s fingers digging deeper into my shoulder muscles. “He’ll get over it. Trust me.”
“What have you and Lindy been up to?” I asked without taking my eyes off Cody’s words on the screen.
“Waterpark. Had some way cool fun. You should’ve come with us, bro.”
“Would’ve saved a lotta fucking grief if I had.”
“So, are you gonna sit here feeling sorry for yourself all night or what? Hey, I know how you feel about your friend Cody. OK? But reading his old email’s not gonna help, man. He’s gone.”
“You been talking to Paul? He said I was still in love with a corpse.” The words had no sooner left my lips than I lost it completely, and dissolved into tears, crying hysterically.
Greg placed his strong hands under my armpits, and lifted me to my feet like I weighed nothing. Then turned me around so that I was facing him. He took hold of my wrists and placed my arms around his neck, then held me tight. We stood like that for a while, in each other’s arms, while I sobbed uncontrollably.
When he finally spoke, he said: “He didn’t mean it. Not Paul. He wouldn’t say something like that unless he was angry. Was he angry?”
“Yeah.”
“Why?”
I told my bro about the convo Paul and I had had in the pool. “I shouldn’t have said anything, but it just kinda slipped out. He was quizzing me. Hey, I’m making a fucking mess of your shoulder, bro.”
“I’ll live.”
“I dunno what to do now. I’ve really fucked up.”
“We’ll work something out.”
“We?”
“Sure. I’m your bro, right?” He gave me an extra squeeze before continuing. “Paul’s probably feeling the same as you right now… lower than shark shit, as Cody would say. We’ll figure out something in the morning. Right now, your mom’s in the kitchen preparing dinner. You wanna give her a hand? It’ll make you feel better – and her. She’s feeling kinda guilty about grounding you.”
“Cool. Then she can unground me.”
“Yeah, right. You know what parents are like, bro. They punish us ‘cause it hurts them more than it hurts us. Must be some kinda masochism.”
My mom was acting pretty cool while I helped her in the kitchen. She didn’t ask me any more questions about the fight, so that was a relief. Maybe she figured I’d tell her about it when I felt like the time was right. Sure. Sex with Paul? Thinking about Cody? No way my mom would ever understand that stuff. No way most people would. And that was the major reason why it was so cool to have a bro like Greg. Even when he didn't fully understand, at least he made the effort.
It was about 7pm when the phone rang. I was still in the kitchen helping my mom, so I had to quickly rinse my hands under the faucet and dry them. “Hello?”
“Daniel?”
“Yeppers.”
“This is Mark.”
“Mark?" I could hardly believe my ears. "You mean… Mark Mark?”
“Yeah,” he laughed. “I met you at the marina this morning. Remember?”
“Where are you? I mean, what are you doing? Like… uh… what’s happening?”
“Is there something wrong? Is this a bad time to call? You sound kinda nervous.”
“No! Everything’s fine. Really it is. Uh… hey… we’re about to have dinner. You’re invited.”
“Hey thanks, but I couldn’t intrude at such short notice.”
“I want you to intrude! No. Dammit! That’s not what I meant. You’re not intruding. I’ve told my mom all about you. She’s dying to meet you. Can you hold the phone a sec?” I place my hand over the mouthpiece. “Mom? It’s Mark, Cody’s friend. I’ve invited him to dinner.”
“You’re supposed to be grounded.”
“OK, so I’m grounded. But Mark’s not grounded. Please, mom! Please!” My mom was acting kinda hesitant, so I figured I shouldn’t take any chances. I took my hand away from the mouthpiece. “Mark? My mom wants to talk to you. Hang on a sec.” Then I handed the phone to my mom. “It’s Mark for you, mom.”
She sighed, gave me one of *those* looks, shook her head, then took the phone. “Hello? Nancy here.” [Pause] “No, no, no, it’s no trouble at all.” [Pause] “You’re not intruding, Mark. It’s our pleasure. I wish I’d known sooner, though. I would’ve prepared something special. It’s only meatloaf and potatoes.” Then mom gave Mark our address. He was gonna catch a taxi. “8 o’clock will be fine. See you then. Bye.”
“Woohoo! Mark’s coming for dinner!”
“That was a mean and devious trick, Daniel.”
“Jeeeeez, mom! Anyway, you’re gonna love him. You’re gonna be soooo impressed! I just know it. And he’s gonna tell us a whole bunch of wicked stories about sailing from…”
“Keep your eye on the meatloaf. Baste it every 15 minutes. And put some extra potatoes in. I’ve got to put my face on. Which reminds me, you’d better put some clothes on!”
That cracked me up totally. Mad at me one minute, putting her face on the next ‘cause she was excited about Mark coming. Paul? Yeah, I wanted to call him. It would’ve been so cool if he could’ve been with us. But there was no way. For starters, I was grounded. And he would’ve been still mad at me. Hey, I was still mad at him! That was the cruelest fucking thing to say – angry or not.
When I’d had a chance to think a bit more about it, though, maybe it was just as well that Paul wouldn’t be there. A lot of the convo would be about Cody, and that would’ve made the situation between me and Paul a helluva lot worse.Copyright © 2003 All rights reserved. mrbstories
