[June, 2003] Hi Gary,
Thanks for the email from the other dudes [about my Codeman graphic]. Good for my ego. I try and download the Codeman stories every fortnight or so, so it takes me a while to get through them, which is pretty cool. I’m up to date now. Steve the prick. I would prefer to print them and read them in bed while fondling myself but, hey … can you fucking imagine? [I refuse to answer that question. :-P G]
The night with Wingnut? Well, it was pretty damn special, and it came as a total surprise to me. And maybe to him as well. He basically wanted an ear to chew on so I gave him something else instead. Hahahahaha. Shit, I mustn’t start my fucking crap and lose the plot.
He wanted to talk because it sounds like he wants to get down with his girlfriend, but he’s not hundreds that it’s the right thing. So he comes to me and expects the best advice? Cody obviously didn’t tell him about me when I was his age.
Anyway, I said it was cool so he came around [to my house] quite late, after the two of them had been to the movies and had a good graunch. I’m guessing [about the graunch] but I reckon it’s a good guess. I was with Steph for a while but we both decided to have an early one, and rather hit out the following night to Blinks or Taboo or something. It ended up being Blinks.
Anyway, he was like a real polite little dude and asked if it was still OK to talk, so I said maybe he wants to stay over. Then he phoned his folks and it was cool. I was busy working on the PC and he laid on the bed, paging through the Mens Health mag.
“What was it like the first time? I mean, like going with a girl?”
“You mean like fucking?”
“Yeah – but not as gross. I mean, like she wants to go the whole bit of talking and foreplay, and [then] nah, nah, nah.”
“You guys talk all the time. It’s not like it’s a mish [mission] for you to talk to a girl. You’ve got it pretty well sussed.”
“Yeah, cool. But when it comes time to pull the raincoat on, Mr Stiffy becomes Mr Floppy.”
I fucking rocked laughing when he came out with that cos he was being all fucking serious. “Crap. You’ve put on a rubber before without all the hassles. So what’s the problem?”
“Cos this is for fucking real. Don’t laugh. You’re the only person I can talk to about this, so don’t be a prick. OK? What about the guys who can’t talk to anybody?”
“They handle it – just like you will. I don’t know what to tell you. You’ve got a bone just talking about it. Check.”
He didn’t need to check cos he knew he had a skin-breaker. So I stood up and then sat on the bed, and put my hand on the bulge in his chinos.
“What if your folks walk in?”
“They’re away. I’ve got the house to myself the whole weekend. So I can rape you and nobody will know anything.” While I was talking to him, I was gently sliding the zip of his pants down. He was wearing white briefs, which were awesome. “So … you into it or what?”
“Cool. But you need to get naked first.”
I stood up, and he stood up, and helped me undress. He pulled my t off, and then my jeans. He’s about as tall as Cody now, or just about from what I can remember. My cock was hanging over my nads, and I grabbed his right hand and folded his fingers around my shaft, which reacted almost immediately. Then I tried something that I thought would freak him out but ……………….
While he was holding my manhood, I took his head in my hands and brought his face to mine. He knew what I wanted to do, and I saw his lips open slightly. His breathing was becoming heavy and fast as we kissed, and I slid my hand down his flat stomach and into his briefs, pulling his boner out from behind the elastic so it could breathe. I’m not sure, but we kissed for at least a minute, maybe even longer. He was blushing. His ears were red and his cheeks were like beacons.
“Hey, it’s cool, bud.”
“Yeah … it’s just that …”
“You’ve never kissed a guy before? Not even Cody?”
“That wasn’t that kinda kiss, though.”
“Well, you’ve got nothing wrong in that department. That’s for sure.”
I pulled his briefs off, and the two of us were now totally naked. I pushed him to lay gently on the bed and I laid next to him, and kissed him again. This time, I let my hands caress his whole body. His thighs, his nads, his stomach, pecs, everything. His hands made their way to my pecs and kinda stayed there. I didn’t want to scare the shits out of him, and anyway it felt totally fucking wicked.
After we stopped, I reached down to my desk drawer and pulled out a condom. I sat cross-legged next to him and he lifted himself onto his elbows, and looked at me as if studying how to unwrap a condom was gonna have a major impact on his life. I can’t remember having that kinda prob, but then I was always so fucking full of myself. The first condom I ever used was put on [me] by an older woman.
While I was unwrapping, I was watching the [tight] folds of his abs. His stomach was flat and hard. Then I put the condom over my finger, and wrapped my finger around his dick.
“What the fuck are you doing?”
“Hey, just relax. I don’t want you to cum all over my finger.”
His muscles rolled as he laughed, and it was so fucking cool. From then on, he was just totally relaxed and we both got lost in each other. It was weird, Gary. It was like having Cody there. This time, he came onto me. He pushed me onto my back and kissed me, and I could feel his hard cock sliding up and down my stomach as he moved his hips.
He licked my chest and put my nipples between his teeth and applied pressure, which was painful but, oh, my fuck!, so erotic. I closed my eyes as his fist closed around my cock, and I felt his warm breath run down the length of my shaft. Maybe it was because we were all alone. I’m not sure. But we ended up rolling around and kissing and sucking each other.
I got him on to his stomach and lifted his hips, and gently opened his rosebud for my tongue to explore. No, I wasn’t planning to fuck him, but if he had offered there and then I would have. My tongue pushed him over the edge and he jacked himself while I explored.
The sex went on for what seemed like hours. We spoke a lot the whole time. I was chatting him about eating out his girlfriend, and he didn’t seem to worry about it. I wonder if he has before. I kinda doubt it, though, cos then they would’ve gone the whole hog already.
Sometime through the night, the two of us blew each other again, with him taking Cody’s favorite position. Cody would always lay on his back. He said it left his hands free to explore me, and I loved the feeling of his fingers. With Winger it was the same. One thing: he didn’t swallow. I must’ve shot a load four or five times, and he would always move his mouth away as I climaxed, leaving my cock in pain as it shot out of control.
[I was about your age when I managed my younger brother’s rock band. We were looking for a name, so I paged through the dictionary. I found the word ‘climax’ and thought that it was pretty cool, having no idea what the conotations were. I was sooooo innocent, and so were the members of the band. So The Climax Four was born hehehe. Jeez, imagine that name today. G]
The next morning, we showered together and I knew that it was one of those nights to be cherished cos it might or might not happen again. Believe it or not, Cody did such a brilliant job with Wingnut. Wingnut is as straight as any guys I’ve met. The two of us getting our rocks off with each other had nothing to do with his sexuality. It had everything to do with an expression of friendship that he feels. At least, that is what I want to believe … and I think I’m right.
We went surfing and never discussed that night at all after that. And we still haven’t. And, no, he doesn’t hang around [my place] as much as he used to, either. Which makes that night even more special.
The fact that we don’t see each other for a while is not a prob. He still reckons [that] he can rock over [here] and talk or … [He’s moving in a] different circle of friends [to mine] from his school and from the surf.
It was good. So there you have it. If I lived next door to him it would be different but thereyago. Hope MrB has a good anniversary.
I was watching ‘Crossing Over with John Edward’ on telly, and I know for sure that Cody is watching all of us.
Peace, Love, Respect,
Your friend and the Codeman’s,
Thanks for the story about you and Winger. Not quite as detailed as Cody would have written but he was obsessed with telling me everything, and he would usually write about his experiences soon afterwards while they were fresh in his mind. I'm glad he did cos The Codeman story would otherwise be just a series of recollections. I don't expect to meet anyone like Cody again.
Your observation about Winger being straight is interesting. Your kissing him reminds me of the time Mark kissed Cody on the mountain [coming up soon in a Codeman chapter]. It was a helluva surprise to Cody, as well as to me. Hehehe. Blew me away! I'd been writing Mark's story for ages but NEVER expected anything like that to happen. So it seems to me that the potential for sex between two guys is a perfectly natural thing, given the right
circumstances and personalities. I guess the reason it doesn't happen all that often [or that we don't hear about it very often] is that most people are screwed up about what's right and what's wrong according to mainstream attitudes. We're indoctrinated from day one about what's expected of us by society, and we're reluctant to admit to any deviation from that code of behaviour, even though deviations do occur.
But it's not just adults who impose that code of behaviour on others. Kids are just as bad with their version of peer pressure. To be 'cool' you have to wear the right clothes, listen to the right music, speak whatever the current slang is, and so on. It's all part of the herd mentality.
So Winger's got his knickers in a knot worrying about whether or not he'll meet his gf's expectations when he takes the big plunge hehehe. Jace's neighbor Sean is going through the same trauma in the US. He's just turned 15. I remember Code's first time. It was with a prostitute - a gift from Paul before he left CT for England. Code was determined to be impressive but he was told by the girl that he was fucking like a weasel. I remember my
first day on radio - my throat jammed, and I couldn't make a single sound at first. Shortly after that, you couldn't shut me up. So Wingnut needs to lower his own expectations of himself, and understand that you don't become an expert at your first attempt - just like surfing. But, again, it's the peer pressure thing - his buds boasting about their conquests and making him feel that he has to live up to what he perceives them to be. That's bullshit, and you need to reassure him of that next time you're having a deep and meaningful. Sounds to me like he looks to you for advice and reassurance in the same way he looked to Cody.
So Cody is watching over all of us? Jeez. I'll bet he's changed his mind about my being an awesome old dude hehehe. I think he had a mental picture of me being something I'm not. Anyway, I'm glad you feel his presence. I also don't think you should be too critical of yourself for being 'Steve the prick' on occasions. If you really were, he would have dropped you like a hot potato. So it's important to remember the good times, and in particular the fact that you two guys made love just a day or two before the accident. You've also become closer to Mark, Wingnut and Steph, as well as the Ts, so I figure things are looking pretty damn good.
In any case, there's no point in regretting the negative aspects of your past. Accept them and learn from them. University is cool, but it's pretty hard to beat the lessons you learn from the school of hard knocks. I think I've graduated from that one. You have, too. Maybe with honors. One MrB reader wrote the other day to say that he thought I was a retired business manager. He used to think that I was a retired psychologist. Nope. None of those. I don't have any diplomas or awards. Actually, I do - the graphics you and Cody have made for me over the years. They beat the hell out of any formal awards. And they're unique.
Thanks a stack for the anniversary wishes and graphics. I'll post them on the 15th. It's been a pretty rocky road, and one that's had more than its fair share of hills and valleys. I think the lesson learned is that survival can be crucial to having friends who believe in you and support you. I believed in Cody, and Cody believed in me, and that set the stage for what MrB is today. Let me quote something that Richie wrote:
"MrB is THE most INTERESTING site and locale I have EVER seen for a cosmic variety of the whole sphere of life... there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING anywhere else like it, or like you... for that matter... :-)"
Yeah, well, Richie does waffle on a bit hehehe, but it was nice of him to be so enthusiastic about MrB. BTW, Brian 'The Pest' wrote to say that he checked out your latest Cody News page, and was blown away by your codydp1 graphic - 'To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.' Too true, mate.
So thanks for your friendship and support, and be kind to the Winger.
Your friend and the Codeman's
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