Tampa, Florida
Part 15
“Can I ask you a personal question?” I said as Mark hit the email send button, giving someone somewhere their jollies for the day.
“Depends.”
“There’s no way you’re not aware of your bod. It's awesome. You chisel away at that thing like it’s a work of art. Actually, it is. So how come you get all bent outa shape if someone admires it?”
“Depends on who’s doing the admiring. If it’s a chick, it’s cool. Guys? They make me nervous.”
“Cody?”
“Took me a long time to get used to him gawking. Even then I had to smoke a joint before I could relax.”
“Which reminds me, you haven’t smoked a J since you’ve been here.”
“When in Rome… Do you want me to shut down the comp?”
“Yeah, thanks.”
“Anyway, it depends on what kind of admiration you’re talking about. I can admire another dude’s bod without thinking about sex, but I can’t admire a chick’s bod without thinking about tits and pussy.”
“You had sex with Cody.”
Mark didn’t answer right away. He rose from the chair, went to the spare bed and pulled down the covers. Then he planted his cute naked butt on the edge of the mattress. “That was different. I loved Cody. No way I could have sex with a guy if I didn’t love him. I guess you could say that I love Fingers, too, but it’s not the same. Cody was unique. I still can’t believe that I actually French-kissed that guy. Mr Macho me, kissing a guy. Tongues going ballistic. Fucking hell.” Then Mark took a moment to smile and reflect on the memory. “But I’m glad I did. Can you imagine how fucked I would be feeling now if Cody had died before I’d had the chance to tell him how much I loved him?” Mark laid on his back, put his hands behind his head, and stared at the ceiling for a while. “I know what you’re thinking, Daniel… that I’m bi. I had a lot of trouble with that notion for a while; wondering who or what the fuck I was. But not now. I figure I can be whatever a certain person wants me to be, provided the feeling is mutual. Ninety nine percent of the time, it’s what a chick wants me to be. Then along comes The Codeman. Heh. What a fucking eye-opener he was. One percent of me was gay… well, gay-ish… and he found it. How incredible is that?”
“Why did you let Steve blow you?”
“Huh? Oh, that. I dunno.” Mark glanced at me for a second, then returned his gaze to the ceiling. “We were a bit stoned. He was going on and on about me being a god or whatever. I guess my ego kinda dictated the terms. A standing cock has no conscience. Don’t get me wrong. I like Steve. I don’t love him, but I like him, and I respect him for the effort he’s made to get himself sorted out. And yeah, I admire his bod. That blonde himbo could have almost anybody he wanted, and there he was in Joburg massaging my ego. So… y’know… it just kinda happened.”
“I totally cracked when you told him he looked like he’d just had a fight with a meringue pie.”
“Yeah,” Mark giggled, and sent his tanned abs convulsing, “that was a hoot. Cracked me up, too. I guess you’ve gotta see the funny side of things, otherwise you’d end up going nuts.”
“Was there a funny side to Code?”
“Yeah… mostly in retrospect, though. I was moody a lot of the time, and didn’t see the funny side ‘til later. Y’know, I really do wonder how the fuck that dude put up with me for so long. I must’ve almost sent him crazy.”
“He loved you. That’s why.”
“Can you believe that? Can you believe that a guy like me was destined to meet a spiky-haired dude who would rearrange me? Who would completely turn me around? I still don’t believe it myself.”
“I don’t believe that there are two hunks in this room with boners and nothing’s happening.”
“Settle, Daniel. You’re too fucking horny for your own good. Don’t let your fucking dick rule your life.”
“What rules yours?”
“The sea. If you’d asked me that question a couple of years ago, I wouldn’t have known the answer. When Code and I graduated from high school, he knew where he wanted to go – varsity to study marine bio. Me? I really didn’t have a fucking clue. Varsity maybe. But to study what? Then I got that temp job at the marina in Cape Town. Whammo. Love at first sight. It was like my whole future was suddenly mapped out in front of me. I was able to plot a course. Well, not exactly. My actual destination wasn’t obvious to me at that point, but I knew that wherever it was, billowing sails would take me there. Come to think of it, maybe there is no destination in particular, just a series of destinations for the rest of my life.” Mark turned to face me, and laid on his side with his head supported by his hand. “Do you have a dream, Daniel?”
“Yeah,” I smiled as I copied his position, and faced him. His boner had deflated to a pretty respectable semi; a fat lazy snake in hibernation. “But you’re too much of a wuss.”
“Fuck off. Be serious.”
“Not sure. Swim coach, maybe. I don’t think I’m smart enough to be an academic like Code wanted to be. Maybe I’ll be like you… find something that suddenly turns me on, and go for that.”
“You could be a model.”
“Yeah, right.” I rolled off the bed, placed a hand on my hip, and did a mini catwalk, mimicking Elle McPherson. “Can you see me prancing around on a stage like this? No way, man. Hey, how about a porno star? Woohoo! My buds and I have already made a couple of amateur vids.”
“You serious?”
“About the vids? Yeah. Wouldn’t wanna be a real porno star, though. I figure it wouldn’t be as much fun being pro. And I don’t think my mom would be all that fucking thrilled,” I laughed, then noticed Mark checking out my bouncing woodie. “Anyway, you could have been a model, too.”
“Not fucking likely,” he cracked as I tumbled back onto my bed. “I don’t need that kind of attention. Once was enough. Did Cody tell you about the time the swim team put on a strip show for the girls?”
“Yeah. How fucking wild was that! Woohoo! Wish I’d been there. Oh, man, that would’ve been too much! Seems a strange thing for you to do, though. I thought you were kinda shy.”
“I was trying to make friends of the guys; fit into the team. I guess I felt obligated. I’d already fucked up with Code by calling him a fag in the school quad, and gotten the coach offside, so… Anyway, that’s all in the past. I was a screwed up teen back then.”
“Like me?”
“I don’t think you’re screwed up. OK, maybe screwed up but not in an aggro way like I was. You’re actually a pretty cool dude – just twisted.”
“Thanks a lot. I hope you don’t mean that. I’ve got enough fucking complexes as it is. My buds think I’m Mr Cool, but I’m not really. It’s mostly show. The thing is, I like showing off. It makes me horny when I turn people on. Did you get horny when you did the strip show?”
“Nah. It was just a fun trip. The girls were going ballistic, but all the guys were laughing, so it wasn’t the kinda thing you could take seriously. It was a cool trip, though.”
“Did you feel good about turning Cody on? I mean, like in private?”
“Yeah.” Time to study the floor for a moment, and then: “Yeah, I have to admit I did. It was different to the way I turned Carol on. With Carol it was mostly animal sex. Wild and sweaty. But with Cody it was more sensitive. Relaxed. Subtle. Romantic. Caring. Gentle. He would spend ages exploring my bod. He was fascinated with every nook and cranny. I think it was his way of getting to know all of me… every single aspect. Cody was a very special person who made those he cared for feel just as special. He was a lover in the true sense. Anyway, you should know that already.”
“I do. But I’m not like you. I act tough but you are tough. No one messes with Macho Mark, right?”
“One guy did.”
“Oh, yeah? Who?”
“Our mutual friend. That guy could pack a whallop, believe me. Whoa! He decked me a couple of times in the ring, and a couple outside the ring. Yeah,” Mark mused as he took a moment to reflect, “you had to respect that guy. Big time. He didn’t take any shit. Well, he’d spit the dummy sometimes and get all bent outa shape about my moods, but he would never back down. So I had to wonder, ‘who is this dude? What’s his fucking mission?’ And I discovered that his mission was me. He didn’t wanna own me or dominate me, he just wanted to be my friend… OK, more than a friend. It’s crazy when you think about it. He earned me. He actually fought for my affection. He had the tiger by the tail and he wasn’t gonna let go. How many guys would do that? How many guys would actually be determined enough to want to be my friend? Me? Huh? Mr Loner? Mr Don’t-get-too-fucking-close-to-me-or-I’ll-freak? I used to wonder what his motives were. Sex? Yeah, he wanted sex. But he wanted much more than that. He wanted my heart. And the fucker ended up stealing the damn thing.” Mark giggled for a few seconds. “Cody was a fucking thief. You know that? A fucking thief. Snuck up on me while I was stoned and stole the damn thing right from under my nose.”
“I wish I could.”
“No you don’t, Daniel,” he smiled. “That’s your dick talking. You’ve already got enough hearts as it is, man, and you’re in the shit with Paul because of it. Besides, I’m Popeye the Sailor Man, and I’ll be sailing the seven seas the rest of my life."
“How many people have fallen in love with you?”
“What kinda question is that? Sounds like the kinda q Cody would ask. Hey, I dunno. People look at me like they wanna know me, but I’m not easy to get to know. So I’m not sure how to answer that question. I’m not Daniel. I’m not Cody. I don’t need a fucking fan club like you guys have.”
“If you learned how to chill out, you’d have a huge one.”
“Come here.”
“Huh?”
“I’m learning something about you, Daniel. You can be so fulla shit, but underneath all that crap - and there's no shortage of it - you’re a pretty special guy.”
“I am?”
“Sure. So come here and give me a hug.”
“Serious?”
“I’m gonna change my mind in a minute.”Copyright © 2003 All rights reserved. mrbstories
