I was mortified when I read the Captain's email about this chapter, and I was a mess when I wrote it today. Be prepared. MrB
South Africa
Part 87
The thing I liked most about Kyle was that I could be myself with him, totally. Well, almost. He still freaked about drugs and stuff. Other than that, we could talk about all kinds of stuff, even while I was laying naked on his bed. Our bed.
"Haven't seen you with Steve lately."
"It goes like that. He goes through stages of being heavy with his rich friends. Most of them are jerk-offs so I'd rather stay away. We're still good friends, though."
"You still do stuff?"
"On the phone, sometimes. I think the pressure of his final exams is getting to him, too. Either that, or he's waiting for Mark to climb into him."
"What for?"
"Mark is totally fucked off with Steve 'cause Steve was at Carol's house one night while Mark was in Joburg visiting his dad. Steve's lucky that Carol actually mentioned it to Mark, and that Mark didn't find out about it through the grapevine. Mark gets totally fucked up if guys try to get off with Carol. And knowing Steve's reputation, Mark figures he wasn't at Carol's to have a cup of tea."
"What do you think I should get Mark for his birthday?"
"He digs Harleys, so get him something with Harley Davidson on it."
"He digs Carol, too. Maybe I can borrow her one night and teach her how to make him happy."
"Yeah... just remember to dig your grave first, though. Anyway, Carol would wear you out, boyo."
"Not the Winger! No way! I've got energy to spare!"
"That's 'cause you don't get any pussy."
"Says who?"
"I know."
"You know jack shit."
I didn't have much money, so I figured I'd use it all on Mark's present, and give him a handmade card. Anyway, handmade cards were cool 'cause you could say stuff that wasn't on store bought cards.
Mark didn't have a birthday party. Instead, all the guys celebrated at Wipeout, which meant I couldn't go. So I waited 'til Mark arrived at Kyle's house, then gave him his present.
"A Harley keyring! Cool! That's a start. Now all I need is the Harley. Thanks, Wingnut, I appreciate it. And the card is cool, too. So who's the guy on his back in the boxing ring?"
"That's you. I'm the one who's standing."
"In your dreams, Wingnut."
"Read what's inside."
"To Conan. Thanks for being a cool prefect, and for helping me with the boxing. Gonna miss ya heaps. Wingnut."
"Thanks, buddy. Hey, I'll be around, so don't stress. OK?"
On Friday night, I went out with Sean and some of the guys. I didn't tell Kyle where I was going 'cause he would've freaked. Anyway, he'd decided to stay home and study.
We were all too young to gain admission to Wipeout, but Sean knew a couple of the guys inside, and talked them into getting some beers for us. Then we took a walk, and smoked a couple of joints.
"You wanna snort?"
"Nah. I'm OK."
"C'mon, man. It's Friday night. Have some fun for fuck sake!"
"I'm already having fun."
"You're a wuss, Wingnut. Here... take a snort."
I remembered feeling kinda wobbly, and being supported by Sean and one of the other dudes. Somehow, we were back outside Wipeout. I was in some kinda time warp. Carol was saying something, and trying to get me to drink coffee. But I was too damn sick to drink anything. Then I heard Kyle's voice. He was shouting. Then everbody was shouting.
The next thing I knew, I was on the beach. I must've been sleeping, 'cause I woke up and puked. That happened a few more times, and each time I puked, I was given water to drink. One time, I woke up and cried before I fell asleep again. I must've been there a helluva long time, 'cause the sun was beginning to rise.
"Carol? What's happening? Where's Kyle?"
"We've been with you all night. Here, have some more water. Kyle stripped down to his boxers, and went for a swim. He's totally stressed out."
My head was still spinning as I stumbled down the beach to the water. Kyle was knee-deep, watching the sun lift above the mountain, when I tapped him on the shoulder.
"I'm sorry, Kyle," I sobbed as he faced me. "I'm really sorry. I didn't meant to."
"You look a hundred years old," he said, then threw his arms around me, and held me tight.
Kyle's powerful arms had never felt so damn good, so comforting, but I couldn't stop sobbing. Soon, his body was also convulsing, and we both hugged and cried until there were no more tears left.
I could smell the puke on my clothes, so I walked further into the water until I was waist-deep, then dove under. Not such a great idea. I surfaced, coughing and spluttering, but at least I didn't smell so bad.
"I don't get it, Wingnut. You look so strong with your clothes clinging to your defined bod like that, but you're so fucking vulnerable. When are you gonna realize that you're not fucking invincible?"
"What happened?"
"Mark saw you being carried by some of your friends outside Wipeout. He phoned me, and told me that you were in bad way. So I thought, "The little fuck is drunk. I'll go get him, and bring him home." When I got there, Carol was trying to get you to drink black coffee. It was dribbling outa your mouth, and you stank of puke. To tell you the truth, bro, you looked fucking disgusting. You still look wrecked. Anyway, Sean and his buds were taking the piss outa you, and calling you wussy boy. When I checked your eyes, they were totally fucked, and I knew you'd taken something stronger than a joint."
"You got pretty mad, huh?"
"I was fucking furious! Dammit! You could've been dying, but all those lame, fuckwit friends of yours could do was diss you! I asked Sean -- who also looked like he was on some shit -- what you'd taken."
"Hey," he said. "Wingnut's handled it before. We snorted a bit, and smoked a couple of joints. It's cool."
"What else?"
"Nothing."
"So I grabbed Sean by the collar, and almost choked the little fuck. What else?"
"Fuck off, man. What? You his fucking mother or something?"
"I'll kill you right here if you don't tell me what else!"
"OK, so we gave him some e as well... in his drink. But he was cool, OK? Now, put me the fuck down!"
"Then I backhanded Sean so hard that he slid along the sidewalk before Mark grabbed me, and yelled, "Hey, Kyle, cool it for fuck sake!""
"Don't give him coffee... give him water."
"Sean was swearing at me, but I didn't even hear what he was saying. I think he and his buddies split when it looked like Mark was gonna tangle with them. So then we took you here, and we stayed with you all night."
"My folks are gonna kill me."
"You're lucky I didn't! Carol was fantastic, which was cool 'cause I might've smacked you. I felt so fucking useless watching you puking and sleeping, puking and sleeping, and looking so fucked. Then you woke up and cried, and I just couldn't handle it any more without bursting into tears myself. So I took a swim. I dunno what it is about water, but I felt like I could've swum forever."
I was still a bit wobbly as we walked up the beach towards Mark and Carol, who were trying to act as though nothing was wrong. But they must've seen me and Kyle hugging and crying. I guessed they were embarrassed... but nowhere near as embarrassed as I was. Fucking hell. What kinda fucking idiot was I?
Anyway, Mark was getting a bit edgy about having to go work at the pizza restaurant, and needing some sleep. Mark was a friend, but not the same kinda friend to me as Kyle was, and I figured both Mark and Carol had hung around the beach for Kyle's sake rather than mine. On the other hand, it was Mark who phoned Kyle. And what if he hadn't? Where the fuck would I be now?
"Hey, Carol?" Kyle asked. "Will it be OK if I take Wingnut to your place? I can't take him home like this. There's no way I want my folks or his to see him like this."
"Yep. It'll be OK."
When I woke up late that afternoon, I was naked on a bed in a strange room. It took a while to figure out where I was. Then Carol appeared at the door.
"So, the grommet's still alive?"
"Thanks for what you did."
"I've also washed and ironed your clothes. Kyle phoned. I told him you slept all day. He'll be here in a minute to take you home."
"I feel so fucking stupid."
"You're lucky to be feeling anything at all, Wingnut. And you're lucky to have a friend like Kyle."
During the walk home, Kyle asked me how I was feeling, but we didn't talk about much else. I guessed he knew I had the guilts big time. And I was freaking about what my folks were gonna say.
"You're grounded until the end of school, son. Your mother and I were worried sick!"
"Sorry dad. We spent the night on the beach, and..."
"You're grounded. Is that clear?"
"Yes, dad."
My dad was so mad, I thought he was gonna give me a belting. But he didn't. And being grounded also meant that I could only hop the fence to see Kyle when my mom was out. Even then, I could only stay a little while.
"So how's school?"
"School sucks."
"It's almost over, anyway. Another month."
"My friends are calling you a bully. I got into a fight with one prick who said I needed a mother to look after me."
"So what happened?"
"I don't think he'll chirp me again... not unless he wants to eat his food through a drinking straw."
"Is it Sean who's calling me a bully?"
"Especially Sean. He says he's gonna pay for a hit on you... to get you beaten up."
"Yeah, well... hey, he's your friend."
"He'll get over it. And Brian said he saw you send Sean on his ass."
"I should've sent you."
"I didn't go out to get trashed."
"So why did you?"
"I dunno. The stuff's there, and everyone's doing it. It's hard, Kyle, and I try. I try hard."
"Hey, I know it's not easy, bro. Maybe you should tell Sean that you enjoy surfing with him, but not the other stuff."
"He'd dump me."
"Is that bad?"
"He's a cool guy, Kyle. You just need to get to know him better."
"Hey, you're the one who's the cool dude, and Sean should feel amped that you go surfing with him."
"It's not just the surfing... it's the whole scene with him. He's fun."
"He buys his fun."
The Captain's postscript:
Then Wingnut made an excuse to jet before the convo got too heavy for him. I know where he's coming from, and I feel for him. I just can't keep on picking him up. Yeah, I know I said I would, but the last time was just too totally stressed for me on top of exams and everything else. Ah, fuck, what am I saying? I'll always be there for him 'cause there was someone there for me when I needed it. Right, B? And don't start blubbering like some big fucking wuss when you read this. You were there, and I wouldn't be here now if you hadn't been.
It's Friday now, and I can look forward to another week of hitting the books. Weather's overcast, but it looks like it's gonna be hot again.
I dunno, B. I've hardly slept this week. I toss and turn worrying about Wingnut. I still battle with the picture of the state I found him in. I feel shit about clouting Sean. What do Mark and Carol, and maybe even Steph, think about my obsession with saving Wingnut's hide everytime he gets himself in shit? I worry, and I lay awake at night crying, sometimes thinking about Wingnut dying 'cause of an OD. I know he's trying, and I know he hates to disappoint me. I really do believe he's trying very hard.Copyright © 2000 All rights reserved. mrbstories
